Beth Mares, clinical member, Ontario Society of psychotherapists, helps with sexual problems and dysfunctions, infidelity, low sexual desire, loss of attraction to partner, sexual dissatisfaction, confusion about sexual orientation, sexless marriage, and conflict over sex. Beth has been working with Toronto couples and individuals for a generation to improve relationship and sexual satisfaction. This service is LGBTQ and kink friendly. Beth also does phone therapy for sexual problems.

No links at the left? access Beth's home page at  Marriage counselling
 

Types of sexual problems Beth helps with:

Conflicts over sex

affairs and other forms of infidelity

distrust, lying, hiding, and obsessive detective work by the partner who has been cheated on

flirting that is hurtful

conflicts over strip bars, "adult" magazines or videos, pornography, internet pornography, etc.

power struggles that interfere with harmonious lovemaking

obsessive jealousy

self-esteem issues, body image issues, insecurity or neediness impacting a couple's love life

scapegoating and blaming over sexual dissatisfaction

couples whose conceptions of appropriate or "normal" sexuality are different due to different cultural backgrounds, different religious beliefs, or disparate personal preferences; for example, one partner wants to act out sexual fantasies that seem weird to the other partner; marital discord over fetishes,  etc.

stress and anxiety in the partner of an unfaithful husband or wife

rebuilding trust on a solid basis--not just "getting over it"

Loss of attraction to partner or of interest in sex

boredom in the bedroom

baffled by a loss of passion

total loss of sexual interest in girlfriend, boyfriend or spouse

loss of sexual attraction to partner at some times

never having been totally sexually aroused by wife or husband

loving husband or wife but being more attracted to someone else

difficulty with making sexual energy and passion compatible with child rearing

seeking help to explore the relationship between desire, boundaries, emotional intimacy, separateness and freedom

adjusting to a lower libido caused by physiological changes

relationship impacted by limitations on the couple's sex life due to ageing, illness or disability

Therapy for sexual dysfunction

Performance anxiety

Functioning normally in casual relationships or couplings, but not in long-term committed relationships

Low sexual desire (lack of libido)

Sexual aversion disorder

Loss of interest

Sexual difficulties faced by older couples

Hypersexuality

Anorgasmia (lack of orgasm) or orgasmic difficulties in women

Other male and female sexual dysfunctions when they are acquired (the person was previously able to function normally) and/or situational (occurring under certain circumstances and not generalized to all situations). When physiological problems are involved, these of course need to be diagnosed and treated by a physician.

For painful intercourse, (dispareunia, vulvar vestibulitis, vestibulodynia, vaginismus) physical approaches--pain management, physiotherapy with a pelvic floor specialist, etc.--are needed in addition to sex therapy (or sometimes without sex therapy). For further information and Toronto resources, see Does sex hurt? Persistent genital arousal disorder in women is also primarily a physical problem requiring physical treatment.

A sexual problem caused by another problem

excessive stress - lack of sleep - overwork - inability to relax

substance abuse - depression - anxiety disorders - eating disorders - personality disorders

lack of privacy or other environmental problems

family problems causing discord or stress

inadequate communication skills

unproductive fighting, lack of tools to resolve conflicts

one or both partners feeling angry most of the time

insecurity - low self-esteem - body image issues

enmeshment - poor boundaries - narcissism - insensitivity

big difference in libido - different preferences in lovemaking

lack of information and misconceptions that detract from lovemaking

health problems, illness

maintaining sexual satisfaction when there is a disability

Therapy for unwanted habits or intrusive thoughts

inability to control use of internet pornography or other pornography

compulsive promiscuity - failure to practice safe sex

using prostitutes or sexual massage parlours while in an exclusive relationship

compulsive masturbation

any sexual practices that are out of control

constant fantasizing about having affairs or other types of infidelity

fears that one will cheat or be unfaithful

obsessive fears that one's partner will be unfaithful

fantasies or dreams that are disturbing or that seem bizarre or alien

compulsion to view pornography that is contrary to the user's values

other unwanted or compulsive sexual behaviours or addictions--see also

Sexual addiction counselling

(Beth also works with non-sexual obsessive-compulsive behaviours and disorders)

Help with a paraphilia or paraphilias

unwanted sexual habits that are unusual or illegal (some exceptions*) e.g.,

SM (sadomasochism) when the person or partner finds it disturbing or problematic

problems related to having a fetish

voyeurism that manifests as peeping (watching non-consenting parties)

exhibitionism (compulsively exposing one's genitals in inappropriate contexts)

compulsive sex in public washrooms, etc.

(Some paraphilias could also be thought of as Sex addictions)

*Exceptions: Beth does not work with people who commit violent criminal acts, as distinct from fantasy. Nor does she work with adults or minors currently involved in relationships that are defined by legislation as "child abuse" or "statutory rape"; that is because anyone knowing about an ongoing relationship of that sort is required by law to report it.

Beth Mares Counselling

Danforth Ave. East in Toronto (on subway, near The Beaches, also serving Scarborough)

Rosedale Medical Clinic, Bloor/Sherbourne, downtown Toronto

Letters on marriage and relationships: 

   Infidelity   Sexual intimacy, low sex drive   Sex problem  Strip bars  Lesbian bed death  

 Copyright © 2004 Beth Mares

Updated April 2010

Voice mailbox for Beth's clients : 416-699-5515

Marriage counsellor offers therapy in Scarborough and Toronto for internal conflict or couple conflicts about masochism, SM (sadomasochism, S&M), fetishes, peeping, voyeurism,  compulsive or addictive sex, bizarre fantasies or dreams, sexual problems caused by sexual abuse, physical abuse, or other trauma in childhood, and any sexual practices or predilections that the client is not OK with.

Marriage counselling in Toronto and Scarborough for infidelity (unfaithfulness), an affair, or womanizing (multiple affairs); becoming trustworthy; rebuilding trust.

Sexology: Toronto sexologist helps with excessive flirting, excessive pornograpy use, addiction to internet porn, ego-dystonic or unwanted sexual practices, fetishes, conflict over cross-dressing, or ego-dystonic sexual orientation.

Same sex couple therapy and marriage counselling. Sex therapy for gay men, lesbian women, bisexuals, transsexuals, same sex couples in Toronto and Scarborough.

Low sex drive

Other issues involving problems with sexuality.