© Grammar Grabbers copyright 1996 Bill Cutler
GG is back!!! Now for the "Yes!" victory salute. I lift my studly (not "Dudly") arm straight up in the air, my food-stained palm is facing me and my hand is making a fist that can double up a U.S. Marine (with laughter), then the elbow is pulled down to the waist with great force. Ouch! I think I cracked a rib.
The world's best, light-headed, ooops, I mean light-hearted guide to English grammar has returned to the Internet to repeat the tremendous success it experienced the first time. (Pay no attention to my pet chicken, Gladys, expressing her opinion on the matter.) Just like "Ahh-nold", I said: "Ahhl-be-bahhck" (even though nobody heard me). Oh yah! Just be grateful, I'm only acting to govern your writing, not acting and then being your governor.
Oh, by the way, all you nice people at your nice web sites who
linked to mine, please update my "duke of" URL in your coding so
your very kind link works properly. I'd ask you all myself, one by
one, but I'm so lovable, there are just too many. Don't use any
sharp objects; my ego bursts very easily.
OK, so where do I get off telling you how to write? Check out my
exciting career details ( yawn ) in my Résumé
Page. Want to
see what I look like? (Don't shout . . . I just asked.)
There's a photo in the Résumé Page and an even scarier one in the
"Misused Words and Phrases" Page. Both of these Pages are in the
links following my Mission Statement (ooooh, cool corporate term,
Spaced-Out Mission Statement
Boy, are you in for a treat! Writing made funny . . . er, I mean
easy! Everyone finds writing
difficult . . . whether it be a formal business document or just a
letter to a friend.
Even professionals is sometimes capable of making mistakes. (Hmmm, I think there's something wrong with that sentence.) That's why I created this Web site. Not for the glory (thank you, thank you), but to offer an unselfish helping hand to my fellow Web travellers.
These Pages aren't intended for the writing-challenged. My
intention is to help people faced with the scary task of putting words to paper -- or to terminal screen.
Throughout them you'll find writing tips and samples of text that could be phrased better. Why bother? Well, for one thing, it's a matter of credibility. Lose that and you could lose customers or a chance for career advancement.
Trust me. I can fix your writing and the procedure will be absolutely painless.
Voila! So there you have it. This is your big chance to impress your boss . . . and all of your friends with your new-found writing skills.
Select an option and fly to your chosen
"Misused Words and Phrases"
"Noooo! Don't Use
"Professional Writing / Editing Services"
To go back to the top of the Page, select image . . .
published off-Web, corporately, in 1994
written and designed by
Webmaster: Bill Cutler email@example.com
And now a word from our sponsors ... well, they're not really my sponsors ...
and it's not really just a word ... but they are links ... and ones that you might want to check out.
Disclaimer: It's all your fault, no, no, I mean
I accept no responsibility for what results from the use of these sites.
OK, time to put away my teddy bear and get serious
for a moment for these interesting and useful web sites.
Free resources for learning English online.
Description: Learn English online - free exercises, idioms, common
abbreviations, slang, proverbs and much more.
UsingEnglish.com - English Language Learning Online
Resources for learning the English language for ESL, EFL, ESOL, and EAP students and teachers.
You can order your custom term paper from professionals instead of writing it.
Custom term paper
Best term paper you can order in the internet, available 24/7.
Essay writing services and issues regarding essay writing: shortest terms and best conditions.
And, as I proudly link myself to the rest of the world on the Internet, allow me
to offer these additional links with gracious humility and the usual disclaimer.
I've had to put in the lines to separate the typographic Davids and Goliaths
and begin my journey to "rule" the grammatical world. (No "get lost" jokes, OK.)
Description: "If you need to write a book report and you lack time or knowledge - this site is for you!"
Description: "The company provides high quality services in dissertation writing, editing and research."
Description: "College term papers are available for moderate prices in the shortest terms."
Please check out the Brand Search search engine,
which has links to a wide range of web sites in numerous categories.
Here's a large collection of slang and colloquial expressions,
some very offensive, currently used throughout Britain and the UK,
updated monthly with a sizeable links page and bibliography.
A Dictionary of Slang
Click here to reach some free and brave Maryland writers
in the land of the free and the home of the brave
The next link is modest in its appearance (and I know "modest"), but
nothing is small about this company's goal: success through plain English.
the Word Centre
InScribe Christian Writers' Fellowship
OK, if you've made it down this far and you just can't take any more,
then let me just wave 'goodbye' to you before the sun comes up.
No, wait! I was just kidding. Don't leave yet. You have to go back up to the links to my other pages. If you don't, I'll have to talk to my lawyers about this! Show them what you think of them by flicking a "cursor two" at them.
If you can't remember where it is, but still want to go back to the top of the Page, select image . . .