THE ROYAL BANK OF MONTREAL
Too big to provide good service, too small to compete globally
THE ROYAL MONTREAL BANK
We’re not royal, and we’re not based in Montreal
Now we can screw you *Royally*
THE IMPERIAL DOMINION BANK
We kept the old-fashioned sounding names because they sound grander
THE IMPERIAL TORONTO BANK
Beg for money, worms
THE IMPERIAL BANK OF TORONTO
The attitude is imperial, the money’s in Toronto
Even more reasons to hate us
THE TORONTO COMMERCE BANK
Who cares about the rest of the country?
THE CANADIAN BANK OF TORONTO
What’s good for Toronto is good for Canada
THE DOMINION OF COMMERCE BANK
Business rules. Forget the customers
What about the Bank of Nova Scotia?
THE BANK OF NOVA SCOTIA
Don’t we look small and friendly now?
The fifth wheel spins fastest
Wait for us!
Perhaps there could be one more merger ...
THE NATIONAL BANK OF NOVA SCOTIA
We should never have joined confederation
But really, to compete globally, the banks need to be even bigger ...
THE ROYAL NATIONAL CANADIAN IMPERIAL DOMINION BANK OF TORONTO MONTREAL AND NOVA SCOTIA COMMERCE
Still not satisfied
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