Some comments I posted on-line in response to the premiere episode...
A secret recording from the Enterprise production offices:
"... MORE sex? Look, we already changed that scene so they're arguing about the Captain's intentions from stalls in the Officers' Showers...
"... NO, c'mon, get real, nobody would buy that. Even if there WAS only one stall, they wouldn't share it, they'd take turns...
"... Well, maybe we can come up with some 'medical reason' for them to grope each other. I mean, 'medical reasons' worked to justify 37D of 9's outfit..."
An Enterprise scene we're not likely to see
"Well, Sub-commander, since you ask, I have to say that at least part
of the reason for the way people are reacting to you is probably, well,
the outfits that you wear. Now I understand that our environment
is uncomfortably cool and damp for you, and the insulating body suits help.
But the body suits by themselves are, well, kind of distracting.
Maybe that's because humans don't have the mental discipline that you're
used to from your own people, I don't know. But I do know
that people would probably start treating you a bit more professionally
if you were to wear some kind of uniform, or
at least something a bit more formal-looking, over the body
suits." Decontamination scene: a consistent explanation
TUCKER: We have
to go through this again, doctor?! PHLOX: You two do seem to keep getting yourselves
contaminated, don't you? Carnivorous
lichen spores this time, very dangerous unless they're neutralized promptly. T'POL: My scanners do not detect any such spores. PHLOX: Well, that just shows you that my medical
scanners are more sensitive for this kind of thing, doesn't it? Now here are your containers of
decontamination gel -- one for you... and -- TUCKER: Different
containers? ... Those gels are different. Why? PHLOX: I did a bit more research, and discovered
that I could improve the effectiveness of the decontamination by using slightly
different formulations which interact with your respective biochemistries. This
one, for you, Lieutenant, to put on Sub-commander T'Pol, has honey in it... and
this one, Sub-commander, for use on him, has n'gaan essence. TUCKER: What's...
"gan"? T'POL: N'gaan. It is a Vulcan plant, used
primarily as a flavouring agent but also
employed occasionally in natural remedies. Applied topically, its essence acts as a mild stimulant, providing
conflicting simultaneous sensations of warmth and cold. [She stares at Phlox.] What is honey? TUCKER: It's, um,
a substance produced by bees. That's an
Earth insect. It's used as a sweetener. And, um, also in some natural remedies.
It's, um, very sweet, and has a
strong sweet smell. And it's also, um,
very sticky. [He stares at Phlox.] PHLOX: Good, then, in you go. Remember, you're off-duty on medical grounds
until you've completed the decontamination, so there's no rush -- make sure you
do a thorough job. Oh, and I've put a
padded bench into the decontamination room, in case you want to -- what's the
phrase? "Take a load off your feet"? Now if you'll excuse me, I need to make sure that my medical scanners
are recording properly, and then get back to my reading about endocrine
systems. SATO (INTERCOM):
Dr. Phlox -- incoming message from a Mr. Thellin of the... "Plain Brown Wrapper
Society"? Acknowledging receipt of -- PHLOX: I'll take it in my office, thank you,
Ensign. Excuse me. Copyright (C) 2001 by Joel Polowin. Permission
is hereby granted to reproduce this material in any non-profit medium provided
that its content is not altered and that this notice is appended. I would
appreciate receiving a copy of any publication in which it appears: Joel
Polowin / 18 Norice St. / Nepean, Ont. / CANADA / K2G 2X5
jpolowinXYZZY@sympatico.ca
but remove the XYZZY - it's a little magic to baffle the spambots.