I'm Gonna Vote You Out

By M.C. G. Real

I saw a photo op of Stephen Harper boxing, and the following lyrics came to me in a flash (I hope I'm not dating myself too badly by parodying L.L. Cool J).

Stephen Harper boxing for the camera
Stephen Harper boxing for the camera

Don't call it a comeback
Been out West for years
Me and Tom Flanagan
Been wipin back tears

Tha day ain't over
for neoconservatives
Yeah we be still fresh
Don't need no preservatives

Big government
Is tha enemy of commerce
We be slayin thoze Liberals
Like we wuz Jeffrey Dahmer

Yeah tha word be spreadin
By email, phone, and faxes
Bay Street loves us
Cause we be cuttin corporate taxes

I'm gonna vote you out (huah!)
Harper says vote you out (huah!)
I'm gonna vote you out (huah!)
Harper says vote you out (huah!)

Some people deserve
To get medical treatment faster
It's natural selection
Not a socialist disaster

If you're sick and destitute
We think that's pretty funny
Cause our HMO homeys
Get to make a pile of money

Don't got time
For forgiveness and repentences
When private prison lobbyists
Be askin for longer sentences

And if stiffer penalties
Start to stick in your craw
We'll beat you down
Wit' tha long arm of tha law


But tha best part of all
Is when Paul Martin bitches
About our campaign platform
We get to be tha snitches

Though he be wailing
Bout privatization
He's had a decade
To shore up tha nation

They trot out they Red Book
In time for each election
And then they beat tha voters
With they Liberal erection

They steal the warm fuzzies
From the NDP
And then they steal their policies
From angry old ME!


It's been a long time
And those voters have forgotten
All tha Mulroney corruption
Back when government was rotten

Now it's our turn again
To do our favourite thing
We'll auction off tha country
Buy our possie lots of bling

Just give us four years
You won't recognize this place
And if you don't like it
We'll spit in your face

Canadians won't be happy with
Tha nation we creatin
But they just too confused
To vote for Jack Layton!


Paul Martin's tha PM
But soon he'll be formerly
All thanks ta tha gangsta
Named Justice John Gomery

Peace out, y'all!

Ryan McGreal
December 21, 2005

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